


Don't.

by InfiniteInferno



Series: JSE Egos Works [8]
Category: Video Blogging RPF, jacksepticeye
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Depression, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, although there is a heavy implication of a certain ending, stay safe everybody, this one is hella dark guys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-26
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-03-02 09:41:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 939
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23849113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InfiniteInferno/pseuds/InfiniteInferno
Summary: Jackie finds Chase on the roof and is extremely concerned for his friend.WARNING: This is extremely dark and references past suicide attempt and the whole thing is about suicide. Please stay safe!!
Series: JSE Egos Works [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1635349
Comments: 1
Kudos: 14





	Don't.

**Author's Note:**

> Please please please stay safe. This entire thing deals with suicide and don't read this if it is an uncomfortable topic for you. If you are going through something like this try and reach out to someone, whether it be a family member, friend, stranger on the internet, or a mental health professional. 
> 
> Also uh I definitely had Friend, Please by twenty one pilots on loop while writing this yikes (go listen to it, it's very good but might make you cry).

“Stop!” Jackie had seen him from where he’d been camped out looking for any sign of trouble - this isn’t quite the trouble he’d envisioned finding, but he couldn’t  _ not _ do anything. 

Not when one of his best friends was sitting on the ledge of the apartment building.

“Chase… please, step away from the ledge.”

“Or what? Huh? Gonna lecture me no matter if I’m sitting here or somewhere else anyway. You’re gonna give me the “people love me and care about me” scpheel no matter what I decide, just like last time, right?” Chase didn’t even bother to disguise his hurt from his tone of voice, nor did he so much as turn around to face the hero. The only movement he made was clicking his pen and setting the papers next to him and placing his phone on top of them so they wouldn’t blow away. 

“Yes, because it’s still true! We still care about you, all of us-”

“Only because you guys feel obligated to, don’t pull that crap on me. You only bother talking to me because you have to. I’ll stop being a burden soon enough, don’t worry. After today you can all stop pretending. I know you must be as sick as I am of pretending by now.”

Jackie widened his eyes and stepped closer. “You seriously don’t think we don’t genuinely care about you huh?” His voice was so soft, it could just barely be heard. “Then explain to me why I’m standing here right now. Why as soon as I saw you here I rushed over.”

Chase shook his head, a forced and empty laugh escaping. “Because you can never stop playing the hero, Jackieboy. Well, news flash! You can’t save everyone, some people are just too far gone for even you. What was it my therapist told me that one time you dragged me there? Can’t help someone who doesn’t want to be helped. That’s why I didn’t bother to go back. I just left the house for an hour every week or whatever to get you off my ass about it.”

The hero took off his mask and sat down next to Chase. “Well, if you really do want to go, I’m coming with you.”

Chase looked over at him and just shook his head. “Why? You have actual people that care about you, hell you have a city of people that appreciate what you do. All I have is an ex wife that would be more than happy if I actually succeeded this time, kids I’m not allowed to see, and a handful of people who pretend they like me. That’s nowhere near enough to make living worth it.”

“Listen, Stacy might be a bitch, but you didn’t hear her sobs over the phone when I called her to tell her about your first attempt. You didn’t see Marvin practically fighting with the receptionist at the hospital to tell him how you were doing. You didn’t see Henrik wasting away at the hospital, waiting for you to wake up. You didn’t see me trying my hardest to be strong for everyone else, but crying myself to sleep, praying to any deity that exists that you would be okay. Chaser, please look at me,” he waited as Chase turned his head towards him before continuing, “we all care so goddamn much about you. So please, don’t do this. Let's go together off the side of this building.” 

Chase shook his head, sighing deeply, turning his attention out again towards the skyline. “The view from here is really great, ain’t it.”

“I suppose it is. And you can enjoy it for so much longer, safely, if you come back with me.”

There was silence for a while, the whole time Jackie was on high alert for any small movements Chase might make. “I didn’t want you to care about me. I didn’t ask for you all to care. This would be so much easier if you just weren’t here right now to stop me. I could’ve been on the pavement by now but you decided to be here. Why did you have to screw this up for me? Why can’t you all just let me fucking die!” He took his hat off and placed it on top of the papers he had to his left. “You don’t know what it’s like to wake up every day and wish you hadn’t. To wonder which conversation with someone will be your last one with them. To realize one day you’re gonna say goodbye to someone for the last time. To never promise someone that you’ll see them soon, because you don’t know if you’ll be alive to. To be so fucking depressed that you don’t even bother to leave your bed all day because there’s no point to it. And you’ll never know, because you’re not broken like me. The only way to stop being this fucked up is just to jump

Jackie shook his head and stood up, stepping down from the ledge, extending his arm to Chase. “Please, take my hand. This isn’t the only way, there are so many different ways for you to get better, but you need to step away from the ledge. If you can’t do it for yourself, do it for me. I cannot imagine a world without you in it, Chase.” Jackie didn't realize tears were falling down his face until his vision became so blurry he could barely see

Chase looked down at the pavement below and looked back at Jackie. He could only think of 2 words to say to him: “I’m sorry.”

**Author's Note:**

> Again, please stay safe you guys. Suicide is a permanent solution to emotions that will fade over time, even if it doesn't seem like it. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, no matter how long it is.


End file.
